Hey, it took Ollie a long time to do these things. He will have been with me for 6 months on Sept. 5. I spent a lot of time with him in the first few months where he just sat in his cave and looked at me.
So be patient. I think it helped that I used a feeding stick, because this was the first real contact we had - Ollie began to tug on the stick.
Also, I decided to feed Ollie smaller amounts several times a day, in order to have him pay more attention to me. If he was hungry and looking for food, I fed him using the feeding stick (unless the food was live). He never became lazy - far from it! You should see him zipping about the tank! And he loves to hunt crabs and crawfish, as well as small shrimp.
But this feeding method only works if you're around a lot of the time. Otherwise, once a day could be preferable.